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Advice for Parents: Talking to Your Child's Coach

One of the best basketball tips for parents that can be offered involves meeting with your child’s coach. Being a parent comes with plenty of responsibility and thus you can’t help but feel responsible for your child. For this reason it is only natural to feel that you should protect your child at all times, especially in cases where your children are actively taking part in team sports. There might be times when you agree or disagree with some choices, procedures or rules made by the person coaching your child, and being a parent, it is extremely important to be a role model for your young person. Thus, it will be best to deal with this matter properly. A good line of communication between yourself and your child’s sport coach will not only set a great example for your youngster and other parents; but in addition, it can help solve problems in the most mature and successful way possible.

Following is a list of suggestions on the best way to communicate with your child’s coach:

Schedule a meeting

One of the worst things to happen is to get caught up in your own emotions if things are not going well and rush up to the coach at the end of a game. Before deciding to pay a visit to your child's coach, take time and schedule a meeting. Make sure that you speak to the coach one-on-one, without any interruptions from others. Get to the point immediately, however, address your concerns in a respectful way. Make sure that you steer clear of public confrontations, or else you may look scandalous.

Advance notice

Notify the coach about the issues you are worried about upfront. This allows the coach to be informed about what your discussion would be about. This will give him the opportunity to prepare for the meeting. Or else, last minute meetings will only bring about stress and could be a source of increased emotions. These types of problems are usually easily prevented through being honest and upfront.

Be direct in speaking with the coach

Try not to be indirect in conveying your issues to the trainer. When you are indirect this means you are using other people to deal with the problem instead of you addressing your concerns directly. You're the only one who genuinely knows what you want to suggest. It is best for you to communicate to prevent misunderstandings. Furthermore, you can ask your child questions related to your issue to become well informed. On the other hand, do not allow them to become a part of the problem that bothers you. You will find that children can sometimes feel embarrassed when their parents are speaking to their trainer, therefore you must use excellent consideration in forcing the problem if it has a relevant reason.

Make sure the meeting stays professional

The environment should be calm and peaceful. This allows the listener to be more open. On the other hand, any place for a discussion will be perfect provided that both of you behave responsibly and treat each other with respect. Avoid communicating via e-mails or phone, if you can. This usually leads to misconception. Talking one on one is much better since you will be able to see the individual before you and it gives you the ability to better assess what is being said.

Utilize effective listening skills

When you speak to other people, you want to feel as though your message is being heard; coaches and others who serve in leadership positions feel the same way. Usually, coaches feel confused by the grievances they are getting from the parents. It will be best if you deal with your concerns briefly, then relax and listen to his response. You can sum up everything you may have heard throughout your confrontation to clear up things. Be open to the seriousness of the problem and create a peaceful approach because trainers feel highly regarded in this way. Make an effort to listen to what the other individual has to say. Likewise, when it is your turn to speak, the trainer will also pay attention in the same way as you were.

Convey an assertive message instead of an aggressive message

Being a parent, the couch can relate to the way you act. Most of the time both parties would like to resolve the issue. When conveying your concerns, be assertive instead of aggressive. Do not be dominated by your intense feelings. When your emotions get the better of you, it can be quite difficult to resolve the issue. Rather convey an assertive message that you know will reach the other person, which shows that you are focused on the issue at hand, instead of the person.

Use the tips listed below on the best way to approach the problem

  • Describe the situations in non-judgmental ways;

  • Explain how it affects you and your child; and

  • Propose ideas on how to solve the problems.

Analyze the situation before taking action

This can help you to take into consideration the positive and negative aspects of taking such actions. Distinguishing between what is right and wrong is relavant. Appropriate problems to address involve the emotional and physical treatment of your youngster, your child’s conduct, information on how to examine your child and techniques to help him become successful. Inappropriate topics involve technique, playing time, other team members and umpire calls.

Proceeding to the next level

If your issues persist and you don't think your child’s coach is capable or eager to resolve the issue, take your concerns to the next level. The Athletic Director can be contacted as the following step. Addressing issues step-by-step will likely result in a more successful outcome, on the other hand, if one person is not willing to adjust, things could become more serious. In such a case, it is best to get in touch with the athletic director or school principal.

Keeping in mind that each circumstance can be different, it is crucial to anticipate the worst and be prepared for it. The above mentioned ideas do not ensure 100% success, however, they will almost certainly increase your possibilities of having a successful conversation with the coach. It takes a lot to change communication behavior, but if you're able to make effective communication your top priority and concentrate on the issue, then you can build better, stronger and more successful relationships for players, coaches and parents.

When addressing issues, it is advisable to be objective. Deal with the problem at hand and not other unrelated matters; otherwise, resolution is difficult to accomplish. Both parties should learn how to listen and allow each other to speak. Everyone has their own beliefs and principles, thus when with issues such as these, pride should be set aside.

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